Rumours are sometimes like a game of Broken Telephone. Remember that game. The first player whispers something to the next player. Each player successively whispers what that player believes he or she heard to the next. The last player announces the statement to the entire group.
I was chatting with an acquaintance to which I thought was just a casual conversation, but when she was a bit too eager to hear the 'juicy details', my b!t3h radar went BEEP BEEP BEEP! You don't know me like that. Trying to lean in close, speak barely above a whisper, and ask personal questions about a mutual friend. If you are so interested in knowing, ask her yourself! I tried to push her off politely and say "that's not really any of my business so I don't know". The 'My Business" is YOU dumba$$! Take a hint. Jeeze.
But, isn't that how rumours get started. They start off innocently enough through chatting. Next thing you know, you are a two faced jerk who said so-and-so was doing this-and-that while wearing the ugliest everything. If you really want to know what the dealio is, ASK THE PERSON! And don't twist my words to pass the time with your idle gossip to the local hood rat. And if someone is trying to drag you into the mud with them, ask yourself why are they asking/telling me this? What do they have to gain? Are they just starting drama? Misery loves company, and they are always looking for people to join them.
If you are the one being talked about, my suggestion is to act like that Simpsons episode where all the advertisements come to life. "Just don't look. Just don't look." lol Do your THANG. Live your life. Dance like nobody's looking. Haters are gonna hate. You can't let them ruin your happiness.
As we become older, you would think this wouldn't effect us. Not like when you are are teenager in high school. But, ever sit around at lunch with some people at work and the only conversation they bring to the table is the b.s. about other people? Or when you are on the GO Train/TTC and you stupidly forgot your ipod/mp3 player and your ears are assaulted with the gossipy clucks of a bunch of chicken heads? Even church folk talk people's business.
I used to be friendly with a bunch a fun girls back in the day. We had a falling out, but c'est la vie. One thing I do remember is we don't talk sh!t about each other to each other. If you have beef with someone in the group, then either keep it to yourself or go squash it with them. Of course it's easier said then done. A friend talked garbage about me. Another friend told me. I was suspect about everything she said and did after that. Without trust, no type of relationship will survive. Ours didn't.
I guess mom was right. If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all. I do caveate all my gossip with "I'm just sayin' " LOL
Rumours by Timex Social Club:
Look at all these rumors-running me everyday-
I just need some time-some time to get away from-
from all these rumors I can't take it no more-my best friend say did you
hear the one about me and the girl next door?-
(verse)
How do rumors get started?-they're started by the jealous people and- they
get mad about somthin' they had, now somebody else is holdin'- They tell
me that temptation is very hard to resist- these wicked women , oohh they
just persist- maybe you think it's cute , but girl I'm not impressed-I tell
you one time only with my business please don't mess--
(chorus)
Did you hear the one about susan?-some say she's much too loose- that
came straight from a guy who claims he's drinkin' her juice- Did you hear the
one about Michael? - Some say he must be gay- I tried to argue but they said
if he were straight he would'nt move that way- Did you hear the one about
Tina? - some say she's just a tease- in a camisole she's six feet tall
she'll knock you to you knees..
(chorus)
I can't go no place without somebody pointin' a finger- I can't show my
face cuz when it comes to rumors I'm a dead ringer- I'll think I'll
write my congressman and tell him to pass a bill- the next time they catch
somebody started rumors-shoot to kill!--
(chorus)
Monday, March 21, 2011
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Epidural
I recently read about a woman whom after three months of giving birth she still cannot walk on her own will. After 34-hrs of labour, they finally performed a C-section. After some investigation, it was uncovered that she had a 'rough' C-section and a lot of nerves in her legs were damaged in the process. A nightmare that is to last at least 1 year, so the hospital says.
I was lucky that I did not have to go through that. Hopefully, not too many people will experience that at the hands of this butcher of a doctor who performed the procedure.
I did opt for an epidural when I had my kids. At first, I had lofty dreams of a natural birth. Although, I did put in my birthing plan for them to give me the option of an epidural before it was too late to administer it. Just in case. I've heard 'horror' stories from other woman in my life that said it was too late to get it. I am fairly tough. I am not a crier. And I have to be hurt pretty bad to shed a tear. But, the pain during the labour was just too much. The first 15-hrs I didn't have anything. But, after that, I was exhausted and couldn't bear the pain any longer. Please give it to me Dr. Feelgood. The nurse was like "who is this?". I was like a completely different person. After awhile though, I was feeling nauseous. I remember giving birth and then puking to the side right after. While holding my son, I turned my head to puke. The fact that The Husband missed the birth and all the drama that went along with it didn't help. An interesting story. Interested in hearing it?
The second time around, I asked for it as soon as I was at the front desk of the birthing centre. Then again when I walked into the room. I didn't want to endure 27-hrs like last time. They finally called in Dr. Feelgood and I was hoping to get relief. Well, he tapped in and I was still feeling pain. They said it will take a few minutes, but I was still holding the bed railings and shaking in pain. They called him back and he put some more. I was still in pain, felt a rush of cold through my back and felt high. He said he had to pull it out and try to reinsert the needle. Looking back, I should have feared being paralyzed. He pulled it and re-tapped my back. The recovery was longer than the last time. Coincidence? I think not.
If that wasn't bad enough, they forgot to collect the cord blood for my second son. While the baby was being weighed and it looked like the Dr. was starting to 'clean up', I asked about the cord blood collection. He was all dear in the headlights and had no clue. I couldn't f'ing believe it. The fracking nurse left he kit off to the side. They fumbled through the kit and tried to collect something. anything. I tried not to cry. Just focus on the fact that I have a healthy baby. I am alive.
Not everyone collects the cord blood, but we made a decision to invest in a cure. I hope we never need it. It's like insurance. You pay and pay and pay. And hope you never have to use it. Plus with cloning, genetic manipulation, and the like, maybe it may save my husband's life. A far stretch, but when you are staring in the face of a death sentence you look for a light of hope almost anywhere. If they can clone a sheep or grow an ear on the back of a rat, it doesn't seem as far of a stretch as previously thought. We still need a kidney from a live donor.
[polldaddy poll=4750552]
I was lucky that I did not have to go through that. Hopefully, not too many people will experience that at the hands of this butcher of a doctor who performed the procedure.
I did opt for an epidural when I had my kids. At first, I had lofty dreams of a natural birth. Although, I did put in my birthing plan for them to give me the option of an epidural before it was too late to administer it. Just in case. I've heard 'horror' stories from other woman in my life that said it was too late to get it. I am fairly tough. I am not a crier. And I have to be hurt pretty bad to shed a tear. But, the pain during the labour was just too much. The first 15-hrs I didn't have anything. But, after that, I was exhausted and couldn't bear the pain any longer. Please give it to me Dr. Feelgood. The nurse was like "who is this?". I was like a completely different person. After awhile though, I was feeling nauseous. I remember giving birth and then puking to the side right after. While holding my son, I turned my head to puke. The fact that The Husband missed the birth and all the drama that went along with it didn't help. An interesting story. Interested in hearing it?
The second time around, I asked for it as soon as I was at the front desk of the birthing centre. Then again when I walked into the room. I didn't want to endure 27-hrs like last time. They finally called in Dr. Feelgood and I was hoping to get relief. Well, he tapped in and I was still feeling pain. They said it will take a few minutes, but I was still holding the bed railings and shaking in pain. They called him back and he put some more. I was still in pain, felt a rush of cold through my back and felt high. He said he had to pull it out and try to reinsert the needle. Looking back, I should have feared being paralyzed. He pulled it and re-tapped my back. The recovery was longer than the last time. Coincidence? I think not.
If that wasn't bad enough, they forgot to collect the cord blood for my second son. While the baby was being weighed and it looked like the Dr. was starting to 'clean up', I asked about the cord blood collection. He was all dear in the headlights and had no clue. I couldn't f'ing believe it. The fracking nurse left he kit off to the side. They fumbled through the kit and tried to collect something. anything. I tried not to cry. Just focus on the fact that I have a healthy baby. I am alive.
Not everyone collects the cord blood, but we made a decision to invest in a cure. I hope we never need it. It's like insurance. You pay and pay and pay. And hope you never have to use it. Plus with cloning, genetic manipulation, and the like, maybe it may save my husband's life. A far stretch, but when you are staring in the face of a death sentence you look for a light of hope almost anywhere. If they can clone a sheep or grow an ear on the back of a rat, it doesn't seem as far of a stretch as previously thought. We still need a kidney from a live donor.
[polldaddy poll=4750552]
Friday, March 18, 2011
Three Kids - Truth Speak
Do I say this "out loud"?
If you read my Three Kids post last night, I talked about my insanity of wanting to have a third child. Even when things don't make logical sense, making decisions is not always made with the brain. The heart wants what it wants.
I want another child because I am selfish and afraid. I do not want to be alone in my golden years. I want to be surrounded by my husband and children. As I pull my head out of the sand in the wee hours of the night and reflect on the weeks of struggle my husband is going through, I fear what future lies ahead in our golden years. My biggest fear is that I am by myself in my 50's without my dear husband. And it maybe more real than I want to admit to myself. These complications the last few weeks breaths chills into my heart and flames my fears.
I wish for Franklin to live with me till our ripe old age, but if we poke the elephant that's in the room, it may not happen. And that is why deep down I want another child. It will be tough to have 3 kids under the age of 10, but all the hardships, tough days, and struggles will be worth having their hugs, smiles, and milestones experienced with my Husband.
I know if I tried to explain this to anyone in my family, they would 'shush' me and not to speak of such things.
I know I don't want to talk about it either.
[polldaddy poll=4750633]
If you read my Three Kids post last night, I talked about my insanity of wanting to have a third child. Even when things don't make logical sense, making decisions is not always made with the brain. The heart wants what it wants.
I want another child because I am selfish and afraid. I do not want to be alone in my golden years. I want to be surrounded by my husband and children. As I pull my head out of the sand in the wee hours of the night and reflect on the weeks of struggle my husband is going through, I fear what future lies ahead in our golden years. My biggest fear is that I am by myself in my 50's without my dear husband. And it maybe more real than I want to admit to myself. These complications the last few weeks breaths chills into my heart and flames my fears.
I wish for Franklin to live with me till our ripe old age, but if we poke the elephant that's in the room, it may not happen. And that is why deep down I want another child. It will be tough to have 3 kids under the age of 10, but all the hardships, tough days, and struggles will be worth having their hugs, smiles, and milestones experienced with my Husband.
I know if I tried to explain this to anyone in my family, they would 'shush' me and not to speak of such things.
I know I don't want to talk about it either.
[polldaddy poll=4750633]
Thursday, March 17, 2011
A Fragment of Exposed Vulnerability
There's a heaviness in my chest
that suffocates each gasp of contentment.
It weighs down my soul
and drowns my reality into darkness.
It is only for a sliver of infinity,
but the emptiness engulfs a lifetime.
Open your heart and feel my vulnerable state.
Do you see my self-doubt, fear and inadequacy?
Once you were a ray of happiness
that radiated into my dungeon of despair.
Where are you?
Where are we?
Sadly, I'm not a warrior every second of this eternity.
There are fragments of exposed vulnerability.
There's a heaviness in my chest
that suffocates each gasp of contentment.
It weighs down my soul
and drowns my reality into darkness.
It is only for a sliver of infinity,
but the emptiness engulfs a lifetime.
Open your heart and feel my vulnerable state.
Do you see my self-doubt, fear and inadequacy?
Once you were a ray of happiness
that radiated into my dungeon of despair.
Where are you?
Where are we?
Sadly, I'm not a warrior every second of this eternity.
There are fragments of exposed vulnerability.
Three kids?!
I must be a total nutcase. A glutton for punishment. I would love to have a third child.
Life with a toddler and baby is challenging. The sleep deprivation. Food differences. Laundry (mainly because of the amount of baby barf). Trying to pack everyone up to go out takes at around an hour. Feeding. Diapers. Bucket car seat. Diaper bag. Snacks. Cell phone. I'm sure it could be done faster. I just haven't mastered it yet I guess. Any parents with kids would agree it can be tough at times. Very much worth it when they say "thank you mommy". or when they come out of no where and hug you and tell you they love you. My heart melts each time I see him smile, when he gives me a high-five when he's proud of something he's done. A house full of laughter and even sibling bickering (I'm sure I'll eat my words to that for sure) sounds like an awesome future.
I've always wanted three kids. If I had to do this baby chapter in my life all over again, I wish I started a few years earlier. I knew it was a lifetime commitment of sacrifice for their success and happiness. No more ridiculous spending. Those are all earmarked for their future. I listed most of it in my Luxury, decadence, or just nasty? post. I wasn't ready. I still wanted to party. Spend money frivolously. Head out to the Casino on a whim. We were living as DINKS and it was great. But, as most woman can agree, the metaphorical internal clock was starting to DING! DONG! really loudly.
We were nervous at first. When he started peritoneal dialysis years ago, the doctors said that dialysis could lead to infertility. We froze sperm when we heard that. Fortunately we didn't need it. First try...is all I'm saying. :) How so very blessed were we. So many other dialysis patients are not as fortunate. This fracking disease will steal your life, but also your future line too. I hate kidney failure.
But, I digress. I want a third child because I would love to have a little girl. I love my boys. They have each other to be friends with. I knew I always wanted at least two. Sadly, we will not be around forever. So, I wanted to ensure someone will be around that will HAVE TO love you. That is what family is all about. LOL I was able to reuse all of Boy 1's clothes on Boy 2.
Unfortunately, I did not start early enough. To have a third child I considered higher risk. That, and the glaring reality that Franklin would not be able to help as much as he would like. If I find it tough when he's sick and dealing with my two boys, it would only be madness if I was to have another. Yet, I still want to. No one is on board with this idea. Not my parents nor my husband. My parents are not getting any younger. They have been a main support system when I am at my darkest. They help pick Franklin up from the hospital, watch my toddler, cook food - when I just had Baby 2, when Franklin is in the hospital, when Franklin gets out and she makes special nutritious Chinese soups, and just to talk. My favourite brother also thinks it's an asinine idea. I have my plate full as it is.
My mom was done having kids by the age I just started. I also want to retire by 55, no later than 60, but really, now would be good too. I actually would love to have 4 kids, but would settle for 3. But, is my fate to have only 2 be my reality?
Sadly, I think so. But, I'll try to wear down Franklin and plant "Daddy's little girl" ideas. mwhahaha
[polldaddy poll=4738099]
Life with a toddler and baby is challenging. The sleep deprivation. Food differences. Laundry (mainly because of the amount of baby barf). Trying to pack everyone up to go out takes at around an hour. Feeding. Diapers. Bucket car seat. Diaper bag. Snacks. Cell phone. I'm sure it could be done faster. I just haven't mastered it yet I guess. Any parents with kids would agree it can be tough at times. Very much worth it when they say "thank you mommy". or when they come out of no where and hug you and tell you they love you. My heart melts each time I see him smile, when he gives me a high-five when he's proud of something he's done. A house full of laughter and even sibling bickering (I'm sure I'll eat my words to that for sure) sounds like an awesome future.
I've always wanted three kids. If I had to do this baby chapter in my life all over again, I wish I started a few years earlier. I knew it was a lifetime commitment of sacrifice for their success and happiness. No more ridiculous spending. Those are all earmarked for their future. I listed most of it in my Luxury, decadence, or just nasty? post. I wasn't ready. I still wanted to party. Spend money frivolously. Head out to the Casino on a whim. We were living as DINKS and it was great. But, as most woman can agree, the metaphorical internal clock was starting to DING! DONG! really loudly.
We were nervous at first. When he started peritoneal dialysis years ago, the doctors said that dialysis could lead to infertility. We froze sperm when we heard that. Fortunately we didn't need it. First try...is all I'm saying. :) How so very blessed were we. So many other dialysis patients are not as fortunate. This fracking disease will steal your life, but also your future line too. I hate kidney failure.
But, I digress. I want a third child because I would love to have a little girl. I love my boys. They have each other to be friends with. I knew I always wanted at least two. Sadly, we will not be around forever. So, I wanted to ensure someone will be around that will HAVE TO love you. That is what family is all about. LOL I was able to reuse all of Boy 1's clothes on Boy 2.
Unfortunately, I did not start early enough. To have a third child I considered higher risk. That, and the glaring reality that Franklin would not be able to help as much as he would like. If I find it tough when he's sick and dealing with my two boys, it would only be madness if I was to have another. Yet, I still want to. No one is on board with this idea. Not my parents nor my husband. My parents are not getting any younger. They have been a main support system when I am at my darkest. They help pick Franklin up from the hospital, watch my toddler, cook food - when I just had Baby 2, when Franklin is in the hospital, when Franklin gets out and she makes special nutritious Chinese soups, and just to talk. My favourite brother also thinks it's an asinine idea. I have my plate full as it is.
My mom was done having kids by the age I just started. I also want to retire by 55, no later than 60, but really, now would be good too. I actually would love to have 4 kids, but would settle for 3. But, is my fate to have only 2 be my reality?
Sadly, I think so. But, I'll try to wear down Franklin and plant "Daddy's little girl" ideas. mwhahaha
[polldaddy poll=4738099]
Monday, March 14, 2011
GO Train Rant
Bby 2's 5am ish wake up has become 6am ish with the Spring Forward daylight savings time rubbish. I'll rant about the switcheroo pointlessness another time. One 'good' thing about consistently waking up this early is I'll be somewhat conditioned to go back to the grind. Work routine. Or more specifically, The Commute. agghhhh...
I am one of those Bay Street Rats who pack onto the GO Train day in and day out. It's been a couple of years now, so I can officially understand what those people would complain about. Before I would think "what are you whining about?! You get air conditioning. You have a better group of people compared to some of the wackos, rudey's, nasties, and teenage hooligans on the TTC. You have a seat without someone's a$$ or crotch in your face. You're not jostled every couple of minutes at each stop with tons of people getting on and off." and so much more.
I always wondered why people were running and pushing people out of their way when trying to catch their train. Because if you don't, you might have to wait 30-60 minutes for your next train! Now, when the commute is already 40-60 minutes, that means a long day is just too long. And when you have kids at a daycare/babysitter's that means money. $5 a minute!
Also, I HATE when people have their bags or feet on the seat. I hear this complaint a lot, yet so many people do it. Did your freakin' bag pay the $6 to enjoy a seat to itself while I walk through train car after car to find a seat? Or perhaps you were raised with no class or manners that you think it is ok to put your dirty shoes on the seat in front of you. I wear light coloured clothes in the summer time and when I saw a dirty mark on my dress after sitting on one of those seats I was livid! Dirty Mother Fukcers! I get it. It's a long ride and when no one is sitting with you, you want to stretch out. Then stretch out with your feet in front, but not on the seat. If you feel it necessary to do so, then put it on the plastic part that separates the seats. I'm not even sure what to say to you people who take OFF your shoes and put them on the seat. Thanks?! At least you don't have your dirty shoes there, but come on. When I get a waft of feet hitting my nostrils I want to gag and then beat you over the head with my purse! This is not your living room. I know you spend enough time on this thing each week that you think it is like home, but show some respect to others and for yourself. Jeeze.
Since I'm ranting about seats, lets keep it going. How about the self-entitled people who think it is ok to save a seat for their friend. Or worse, save 3 seats! Sorry your friend is slow as molasses getting here, but the seats are limited and I am not standing for 40 minutes until the train thins out to get a seat. Tell their a$$ to hurry the F up or YOU ALL can stand together if you are so concerned with being all together during the commute home. I went to sit down once and this chick has the nerve to say "I'm saving that for a friend". There are other seats I guess. But, why should I go looking around because of your slow friend and your b.s.?! I paid my fare. I'm here early enough to get a seat (see running and tackling above). I want a seat without all the attitude and stink eye.
After a long day I DO NOT want to hear you b!t3h about your job for the entire ride home. You just spent all day at your job, do you really want to live work stuff a minute longer when your are not even 'on the clock'. Get paid to stress about work. Otherwise, let it go. Start to unwind and unplug from work life and start enjoying your quiet time before you get home. And for me, it's home to kids, husband, and dinner. Most of the time that's awesome, but there are days where I just want to stay on past my stop and have it pull into an already made dinner with kids that are asleep and a hot bath is waiting. But, getting the exciting "Mommy! Mommy!" and kisses hello from my boys has me running for my train and getting off at the right stop each time. People who talk too loud to each other or on the phone need a dedicated car for themselves. If that's your thang then groovy for you, but be considerate to others around you. This is not your living room or local bar where you all are catching up over a pint.
Make-up people. Not sure what to say about you. Because sometimes I have to say it to myself too. This is not your bathroom. Wake up 5 minutes earlier and put your face on at home. I see you pull out your make-up bag and it is quite the regime. Concealer. Powder. Eyebrows. Eye Shadow. Lip liner. Lipstick/gloss.
The GO Train parking lot is another area that needs a beating stick. Let a car in. Take turns. You were let in, now pay it forward. Karma people. Try not to run people over. It's a fracking parking lot. You shouldn't be speeding in there. You save yourself maybe 10 minutes?? Is it worth the extra stress and road rage? I bet your blood pressue doesn't think so, nor the people you cut off.
The newspaper mess is just unacceptable. It's great getting a free paper to read the headlines, shout outs, do the soduko, and read your horoscope. Now, just remember to bring it with you OFF the train you lazy mofos! There are recycling bins at every stop. Why should someone clean up your mess?! When I see someone reading their paper, particularly the star, although all papers are guilty, and throw section by section under their seat, then NOT pick it up after, really pisses me off. Why should I sit surrounded by your laziness?!
I wish I could sleep like some of you. Although, at the same time I am glad that I can't. I'd hate to be one of those mouth open, drooling, or snoring loudly type sleepers that is on the GO. I always have something to keep my mind off the 100's of things that usually repeat themselves that usually leave me stressed. Tons of choices - MP3 player to listen to some vibe. Either to get me pumped, relax, reflect on how life was during that time when the song was a hit, etc; Watch a movie/show on the small screen; DS with my R4 so I have tons of games to choose from. My brain age is 20 btw; A book/magazine; Free newspaper; Something. If I don't have anything, which sometimes happens because I'm bad at keeping things charged, it's a long ride. Although, I try to close my eyes and meditate. Definitely, not my strength.
But, as my silver lining is, at least I don't have to take a commuter train in Japan or India.
[polldaddy poll=4716210]
I am one of those Bay Street Rats who pack onto the GO Train day in and day out. It's been a couple of years now, so I can officially understand what those people would complain about. Before I would think "what are you whining about?! You get air conditioning. You have a better group of people compared to some of the wackos, rudey's, nasties, and teenage hooligans on the TTC. You have a seat without someone's a$$ or crotch in your face. You're not jostled every couple of minutes at each stop with tons of people getting on and off." and so much more.
I always wondered why people were running and pushing people out of their way when trying to catch their train. Because if you don't, you might have to wait 30-60 minutes for your next train! Now, when the commute is already 40-60 minutes, that means a long day is just too long. And when you have kids at a daycare/babysitter's that means money. $5 a minute!
Also, I HATE when people have their bags or feet on the seat. I hear this complaint a lot, yet so many people do it. Did your freakin' bag pay the $6 to enjoy a seat to itself while I walk through train car after car to find a seat? Or perhaps you were raised with no class or manners that you think it is ok to put your dirty shoes on the seat in front of you. I wear light coloured clothes in the summer time and when I saw a dirty mark on my dress after sitting on one of those seats I was livid! Dirty Mother Fukcers! I get it. It's a long ride and when no one is sitting with you, you want to stretch out. Then stretch out with your feet in front, but not on the seat. If you feel it necessary to do so, then put it on the plastic part that separates the seats. I'm not even sure what to say to you people who take OFF your shoes and put them on the seat. Thanks?! At least you don't have your dirty shoes there, but come on. When I get a waft of feet hitting my nostrils I want to gag and then beat you over the head with my purse! This is not your living room. I know you spend enough time on this thing each week that you think it is like home, but show some respect to others and for yourself. Jeeze.
Since I'm ranting about seats, lets keep it going. How about the self-entitled people who think it is ok to save a seat for their friend. Or worse, save 3 seats! Sorry your friend is slow as molasses getting here, but the seats are limited and I am not standing for 40 minutes until the train thins out to get a seat. Tell their a$$ to hurry the F up or YOU ALL can stand together if you are so concerned with being all together during the commute home. I went to sit down once and this chick has the nerve to say "I'm saving that for a friend". There are other seats I guess. But, why should I go looking around because of your slow friend and your b.s.?! I paid my fare. I'm here early enough to get a seat (see running and tackling above). I want a seat without all the attitude and stink eye.
After a long day I DO NOT want to hear you b!t3h about your job for the entire ride home. You just spent all day at your job, do you really want to live work stuff a minute longer when your are not even 'on the clock'. Get paid to stress about work. Otherwise, let it go. Start to unwind and unplug from work life and start enjoying your quiet time before you get home. And for me, it's home to kids, husband, and dinner. Most of the time that's awesome, but there are days where I just want to stay on past my stop and have it pull into an already made dinner with kids that are asleep and a hot bath is waiting. But, getting the exciting "Mommy! Mommy!" and kisses hello from my boys has me running for my train and getting off at the right stop each time. People who talk too loud to each other or on the phone need a dedicated car for themselves. If that's your thang then groovy for you, but be considerate to others around you. This is not your living room or local bar where you all are catching up over a pint.
Make-up people. Not sure what to say about you. Because sometimes I have to say it to myself too. This is not your bathroom. Wake up 5 minutes earlier and put your face on at home. I see you pull out your make-up bag and it is quite the regime. Concealer. Powder. Eyebrows. Eye Shadow. Lip liner. Lipstick/gloss.
The GO Train parking lot is another area that needs a beating stick. Let a car in. Take turns. You were let in, now pay it forward. Karma people. Try not to run people over. It's a fracking parking lot. You shouldn't be speeding in there. You save yourself maybe 10 minutes?? Is it worth the extra stress and road rage? I bet your blood pressue doesn't think so, nor the people you cut off.
The newspaper mess is just unacceptable. It's great getting a free paper to read the headlines, shout outs, do the soduko, and read your horoscope. Now, just remember to bring it with you OFF the train you lazy mofos! There are recycling bins at every stop. Why should someone clean up your mess?! When I see someone reading their paper, particularly the star, although all papers are guilty, and throw section by section under their seat, then NOT pick it up after, really pisses me off. Why should I sit surrounded by your laziness?!
I wish I could sleep like some of you. Although, at the same time I am glad that I can't. I'd hate to be one of those mouth open, drooling, or snoring loudly type sleepers that is on the GO. I always have something to keep my mind off the 100's of things that usually repeat themselves that usually leave me stressed. Tons of choices - MP3 player to listen to some vibe. Either to get me pumped, relax, reflect on how life was during that time when the song was a hit, etc; Watch a movie/show on the small screen; DS with my R4 so I have tons of games to choose from. My brain age is 20 btw; A book/magazine; Free newspaper; Something. If I don't have anything, which sometimes happens because I'm bad at keeping things charged, it's a long ride. Although, I try to close my eyes and meditate. Definitely, not my strength.
But, as my silver lining is, at least I don't have to take a commuter train in Japan or India.
[polldaddy poll=4716210]
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Dialysis at Sea - Possible?!?
It's not just for retirees anymore. Cruises cater to just about anyone. Even those who require dialysis. Dialysis at Sea cruises offers dialysis on regular cruises. Their space is limited as they limit any sailing to a maximum of 12 patients per sailing. The cruise would be perfect to experience with him. And the dialysis is right on the ship so he wouldn't have to travel anywhere like we did when we went to Bahamas.
The Bahamas trip was the first time in ever that we did dialysis outside of our home/hospital. It was a bit pricier compared to some other all inclusive Caribbean vacation spots, but if we heard it had a good dialysis clinic that was clean from another dialysis patient. My family also made the sacrifice at the higher price so that Franklin could come. I was pregnant. All my immediate family went. Parents, brothers and their family crew. 16 of us in total. It was a dream vacation. My family was there to help me with my toddler. My favourite brother went with Franklin twice and my dad once to do the dialysis clinic. Franklin said no one had to come, but as my favourite brother said, if shit was to happen, you need someone there with you. They sacrificed hours out of their vacation so he wouldn't be by himself. Especially my favourite brother. He had S, J, and J with him, but he still went. Man, I love my favourite brother. Always there for us. Always willing to sacrifice without being asked. Never makes a big deal about it. We are so lucky to have him.
It's just in addition to typical vacation costs anyone would incur, we have to add dialysis costs. To the tune of ~$1800. Can we afford it. Not really. But this past few weeks was reality check I needed. Money will not keep me happy. The experience with my boys and the memories will. I keep my head in the sand and keep waiting, but I just don't know how things will be next year. I wished we did the big wedding and vacationed more during the four years he had the transplanted kidney from his generous brother. He offered the gift of life as soon as he found out Franklin needed one. We didn't even have to ask. How amazingly generous is he?!?
No one knows if they will be around next year. You could get hit by a truck! I try to Live Life as much as I can. And so should YOU!
Now to start planning and budgeting as much as we can. Europe, Caribbean, East? West?
[polldaddy poll=4707081]
The Bahamas trip was the first time in ever that we did dialysis outside of our home/hospital. It was a bit pricier compared to some other all inclusive Caribbean vacation spots, but if we heard it had a good dialysis clinic that was clean from another dialysis patient. My family also made the sacrifice at the higher price so that Franklin could come. I was pregnant. All my immediate family went. Parents, brothers and their family crew. 16 of us in total. It was a dream vacation. My family was there to help me with my toddler. My favourite brother went with Franklin twice and my dad once to do the dialysis clinic. Franklin said no one had to come, but as my favourite brother said, if shit was to happen, you need someone there with you. They sacrificed hours out of their vacation so he wouldn't be by himself. Especially my favourite brother. He had S, J, and J with him, but he still went. Man, I love my favourite brother. Always there for us. Always willing to sacrifice without being asked. Never makes a big deal about it. We are so lucky to have him.
It's just in addition to typical vacation costs anyone would incur, we have to add dialysis costs. To the tune of ~$1800. Can we afford it. Not really. But this past few weeks was reality check I needed. Money will not keep me happy. The experience with my boys and the memories will. I keep my head in the sand and keep waiting, but I just don't know how things will be next year. I wished we did the big wedding and vacationed more during the four years he had the transplanted kidney from his generous brother. He offered the gift of life as soon as he found out Franklin needed one. We didn't even have to ask. How amazingly generous is he?!?
No one knows if they will be around next year. You could get hit by a truck! I try to Live Life as much as I can. And so should YOU!
Now to start planning and budgeting as much as we can. Europe, Caribbean, East? West?
[polldaddy poll=4707081]
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)