It's almost time to pimp my ass for a pay cheque. Going back to work to get paid by The Man in the corporate world so my family can enjoy new clothes, good food, toys, and hopefully a vacation can be snuck in there too. And dear I dream to retire early. I'll probably still work, but only because I want to, not because I have to.
As we budget my maternity leave income it's a constant battle of wants vs. needs. We don't really need for anything. We have a roof over our head, food in the fridge, closet filled with clothes, too much toys, cars, etc. But, which kid doesn't want another toy? Which husband doesn't want more golf anything? And which wife doesn't want more everything?
Sometimes, I wonder if I should go back to work early. A maternity leave income when you are carrying a mortgage and maintaining a home is not the easiest thing. You have to balance quality of life and balance the bank account with the bills that come in every month. I'd love to stick my head in the sand and just spend without abandon and stick every piece of mail into a garbage bag to deal with later. I'd be lying if I said I have never done that before. Probably a bit too often.
But, as much as I like the money a full-time career provides, I will not cut short my limited time with my baby. I love the freedom to breast feed on demand. To be able to take a nap for an hour when my new born loved his 3am curtain calls for an entire show of food, diaper change, and singing. I'm looking forward to making baby his first foods with my loving hands. Not so much the adult-like poos that will follow, but will be worth it to see him grow up happy and healthy. I'd love to stay at home with the kids. Have them come home for lunch to a hot meal, like I used to. I'd love to be able to sell my crochet stuff for a bit of extra cash and maybe a website that sells items that would help me be able to stay at home. I currently enjoy my job, and fortunately, it allows flexibility to work from home. It's a bit of a commute, but I love working with adult learners teaching them technology.
I am so lucky to have a whole year off to be able to be there for my son. I only hope that I'm doing a good job. I will give him my all my love, patience, dedication, and understanding. Then it's 12-hr days away from him as I need to make that money to invest in his future. I can only imagine how much University will be by the time my kids go to school.
People sometimes ask if I will be going back to work after my maternity runs out. I'm sure that's a decision every woman has to make as the time approaches. But, for me, there is no decision to make. I have to go back. Money is a necessary evil in this world. It buys the freedom to get what you want and go where you want, when you want. Dialysis itself every night is a job in itself. The Husband did both for 10-years, but the disease is reaching another level and has him working on a quality of life living on this disease that is draining him on a good day. I'd rather not share what bad-bad days are like. Perhaps in a post when I need to purge the sadness in my heart. It's always there deep down inside, sometimes on the verge engulfing my strength and making me cry in sleep, but for the most part, I focus on the positive. He's here as a loving husband and father.
Although, in the western world, one can never be poor poor. Travel the world like the slums of xyz, then you can truly appreciate all the riches of our great country. Oh Canada! We have free health care. Welfare. Public housing. Food Banks. Programs to rehabilitate you into the working world. Any one of us could be one pay cheque away from using these things. If your partner suddenly became sick, would you be able to still pay the bills? Suppose you suddenly get laid off and can't find work for several months, will you have to consider using a food bank? If you lose your house in a fire and have to start over, could you? Give to charities because hope you never have to use it.
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