Biggest Loser

So, one of my 2011 resolutions was to make myself a priority and become  FABulous again.   I signed up for Zumba and setup some tools to help me with my diet.

First: Zumba – FUN! FUN! FUN!

I thought to myself  “I have rhythm.  I can dance.  This should be easy to transition into getting more active”.  That’s what I thought.   Then I went to my first class and felt like I had one  left foot on an old lady’s body.  I say one because I could do most of the moves and didn’t twist an ankle.  I did go the wrong way then the rest of the class.  I did bump into the fan that was behind me.  I did laugh my head off at how funny I looked in the front mirror.   Oh what a sight: red faced, going the wrong way, and laughing like I was high.  Good times.

Second: Diet – Game ON!

So, to help motivate me to stay on this diet I engaged my oldest brother into a Biggest Loser type competition.  We will have a weigh-in at our weekly family dinners and the winner of the $5 from the other person will be the person who loses the largest percentage of body weight from the previous week.  We’ll have a 3 and 6 month BIG weigh in:  who ever has lost the highest percentage of weight change from the original start weight.  We agreed $20 for that one.  Yes, we could have agreed to bigger money, i.e. $100, but the reality is my brother and I are uber competitive.  It’s not the money, but the personal honour of being able to shamelessly emotionally abuse the chubb chubb that motivates us.  I can’t weight! (not a spelling mistake, but bad pun)

Now that Franklin has many more ‘good’ days than before, I see us getting out more.  Why better now compared to before?  I’ll save that for another day of reflection.

The ‘uber’ (aka unhealthy) competition conversation:

Brother:  I will die before I lose

Me: You just might old man.  Be careful.  I joined Zumba!  (note to reader: I realize I have to do more that one measly class a week, but gotta start somewhere, so spppfft )

Brother:  Well, I’ve got hockey.

Me:  Men do lose weight faster than woman, but I am younger and breastfeeding!

Brother:  ewwwww

Me: ha ha ha.  Breastfeeding!!  Breastfeeding!!

For those who need the math: example – (start at 200 pounds and lose 10 pounds and you have lost 5%)

[(Start weight - Finish Weight) X 100 / Start weight = percentage lost.].

Second again – Tracking what I put in my belly

I’m using MyFitnessPal.com to track what I put into my mouth.  It’s pretty good.  You enter your starting weight and target weight by when and it will tell you how much calories you need to eat to reach your goal.   They have a database of food that I can search.  I select what I ate and the portion.  The site will calculate the calories, carbs, fat, protein.  It’s not so much I’m counting, but just to be aware of what I’m eating.

I got rid of all the chips and cookies.  I know the family would like to have one and when company comes over who doesn’t want to have a snacker handy.  But, if it’s in the house I’ll eat it.  I don’t have the self-control part down yet.  For food and for many other things for that matter. lol  For some of my friends is alcohol, smoking, shopping, etc.  YOU know who you are.  You can relate.

Diet is not the politically correct term anymore.  Life style change is the buzz word now.  Well, it’s a diet now until it becomes second nature to turn down a second portion of delicious lasagna, choose fish instead of steak since I’ve already eaten red meat twice this week, pass on the chocolate fudge cake and have fruit.  I’m still getting a handle on portion control so I could eat a sliver of cake or only two cookies.

I WILL get there.

Potty Mouth - LITERALLY

ewww! ewww! ewww!  You'd think I would know better by now.

It starts off with a 4:13am wake up cry.  At first it sounded like mwah mwah mwah mwah like Charlie Brown's teacher.  Then you slowly figure it out.  PICK ME UP! MY DIAPER IS DIRTY! FEED ME!  The more intense crying then the 1:15am cry.  Hey, after 3-months of interrupted sleep, you're not always as swift.   You try it!  Also, it used to be the 3am show.  Check my FB posts to see the pattern.

But, I digress.  As I change his diaper I'm doing things via small lamp lighting.  I've done this a gajillion times.  No problem right?  I'm singing a little ditty that goes like this "You're name is Lucas.  My name is Mommy.  His name is Marcus.  And Daddy too.  We all love you every daaaaaaay, even when you pee or poo" (in the tune of "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine")

Well, when you change boys you either have to be FAST or PREPARED.

By being prepared you have to:

1. Put a tissue over their goo-goo while you do everything.  i.e. put their hand mittens back on, wiping, putting on butt cream, that kinda stuff


2. KEEP YOUR MOUTH CLOSED!

I obviously wasn't "prepared" at 4:30am and I knew it once  the fluid hit my lips.  OMG!  That woke my ass up real quick.

note to self: Be faster at changing diapers

Get the $%# UP and help me with the kids!!!

I contemplated whether to write about this or not.  Then I re-read my first post. This is to help me vent my feelings.  I also re-read the marriage post, and I have to say something otherwise I will grow to resent him (and it's starting).  So, instead of saying it to The Husband, because really it's not his fault, I will vent here.

I've been up several times over the night for feedings and newborn baby sleepness. So, when Marcus wakes up at 6am and Lucas is still sleeping, I go with him to his room and just have him lie down with me to cuddle.  By 6:30am he goes to our bedroom to wake up The Husband since I fell asleep.  Back and forth he goes until Lucas wakes up.  I bring Lucas into Marcus' room and together we fall back asleep.  Franklin is still sleeping and Marcus is watching SpongeBob in our bedroom with him.  All is right in the world.

Then SpongeBob is over, Franklin has yelled at Marcus to leave him alone, and Lucas is  now up and crying.  Time to get up!  Morning diapers and teeth brushing await before we feed my now hungry toddler.

So, the morning goes on with blueberry whole wheat pancakes (homemade of course.  even the pancake mix!), spread with a bit of peanut butter and topped with whipped cream (a Marcus request of toppings).  Delicious AND Nutritious!  We sing and dance while I cook, do dishes, and sweep up.  Watch Train your Dragon movie while we eat then play hockey with his newly bought foam hockey sticks.

I've changed 2 morning diapers and an additional 3 poopy diapers and it's not even 11am yet!  I want to go take a shower and take a nap since Lucas has gone back to sleep.  Franklin, it's 11:30am, think you could wake up by 12pm?  A mumbled 'sure'.

It's 12pm and Marcus is starting to get stir crazy.  The movie is done.  He's starting to hit Lucas with his foam hockey sticks.  Lucas is getting cranky and doesn't want to be in his Bumba chair, nor his bouncy chair, nor sit on the couch, or bounced on my knee.   He wants this monkey to dance.  You know....walk around and sing while I carry his 14 lbs.  30 minutes?   NOT ENOUGH!!  Marcus has taken off all his clothes on the pretense that he wants to use the potty and refuses to put it back on.  He's going to get his goo-goo juice everywhere!  He has climbed the outside part of the stairs so he can flick the living room lights on and off.  The patients are running the asylum!

Franklin, can you get the $#%!@ up already!  I was understanding when yet again I have to wake up with our toddler after waking up several times in the night with our newborn.  I was understanding when I changed several diapers all morning while you slept.  I was understanding when I came down to a sink full of dirty dishes that I washed even though  you said you would do them.  I was understanding when I swept the living room and kitchen even though you said you would help out more.

I know the dialysis is taking its toll on your body and you're exhausted.  But, what the hell was the excuse for not doing the dishes last night when you were feeling well?!  What was the excuse that you're going to use for not sweeping up?!  What's your excuse for leaving your snacks from last night on the coffee table yet again?!

The reality is, you could have taken care of all of it this morning and helped me if you were not surviving by doing dialysis everyday to save your life.  I'm just tired.  physically and mentally.

I resent the disease not you darling.  I say this now.  At the end of my rant.  I sure didn't feel this way when I started writing this.  Oh Blog.  You saved Franklin from my frustration.

 

Marriage - Happy Wife Happy Life

A dear friend of mine let me know that their marriage was not working and a separation was inevitable. I wish I was there to give her a big hug and just hold her. She wasn't crying. More matter of fact. So I suspect that this hurt feeling has been for some time and has reached the point of no return. When you don't love anymore, there is no foundation for hurt feelings, happiness, nor anger. I guess that's where the saying goes that arguing is healthy. there's still hope.

When something like this happens close to home, it makes me reflect on my own life. How the hell have I been with Franklin for 20-yrs?! We've had a couple of breaks in our early years during high school and university, but that just helped me appreciate that Franklin is a good man. Dating was tricky. Met some good people, but way too many that only had sex on the brain, played games, and b.s. like that.

A relationship is not always easy . Be it with friends, family, co-workers, your spouse, or your teenage children! (from what I hear about them youths. I'm already scared how that'll be :P)

Franklin and I are not always on the same page. We have disagreements about big stuff like his dialysis treatments at home and petty stuff like leaving dishes on the counter instead of the sink. But, after 2-days of it being on the counter, frackin' clean it! That's all I'm saying. lol...can you tell which petty complaint I have??

Try having SEX with same person year after year. Sex in the City doesn't focus on any of that. It does take effort on both parts. The 'honeymoon' period, 1-yr for some, 10-yrs for others, makes it easy to make sweet love to your partner. But, throw kids, a mortgage, aging parents, health issues, sleep deprivation, etc. then you sometimes have to make an extra effort. Date nights, Fantasy, Role Playing, Toys, Stories, WHATEVER! Just make sure you do them with your husband/wife and not the hottie at work :P

A couple of things I've learned (and no, the below list does not have specific sex positions to help you survive 20-yrs, experiment for yourself!):

Choose your battles - Sometime it's not worth arguing over.

Speak your mind - If you keep emotions bottled up, you just grow to resent the other person.

It's the little things that add up - Make an effort to make the other person feel special. A phone call to say I love you. An emailed article about a topic they might like. A special meal after a rough week.

Looks do matter - Keep looking good for your partner and for yourself. Nobody finds a slop who is fat & sweaty attractive. B.O. is NOT sexy...ewww

Forgive - It's probably one of the harder ones, but is one of the strongest tools. I find it particularly hard when The Husband is 'sorry' for the same frackin' thing AGAIN. Put your dishes in the sink already!!

When the stars are all aligned and Franklin's does all of the above, I know I'm happy.

POO EMERGENCY! POO EMERGENCY!!

Well last night's sleep was better than most night's sleep lately.

Lucas woke up only twice! 11pm, 2:45am, 4:45am then fully awake by 6:30am. I don't count 11pm since I was awake anyway and 6:30am is sleeping in for him. This sleep deprived reality is a Princess' birth control. HAHA

It got 'better'. As the fam and I chatter in our bed together, Lucas poos with a half-smile grunt. greaaaaaaat. I know I'll be in for a treat, but I didn't expect it to be so 'special'.

I carry him over to the baby room and i feel a dampness on his back. Yes..you read right...HIS BACK! As I take off his clothes I see that it's gone up his back AND his front. How the hell does it DO that?!? Bath time at 7am. waaaaaaah...I want a greasy big breakfast!

This is a 'scared straight' moment for you future Maury Povich guests who are not practicing safe sex.

Hello world! Eleisa's First Blog Post

Where do I start with this thing?  I'm a total newb when it comes to blogging and I'm not sure what the protocol is.

QUESTIONS: Who's going to read it?  What will they think?  Should I really blog about this or that?

ANSWER:  Who gives a $h!t#*?!  This is an outlet for me.  An outlet to vent some ugliness, share the sunshine of Franklin's good days, and the idiosyncrasies of my boys growing up.  No offense dear reader.

REALITY:  My ego cares!  Yes, this is for me to document my life, but deep down I still slightly want to know what you think.  I say "slightly" to protect dear precious Ego for when there are no reads/comments.    I like to write.  The cliche of writing down your feelings to help sort yourself instead of yelling/crying/calling everyone works for me.

So, here I am.  Sharing.

I hope you enjoy.